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I just ended a relationship with a guy who got me.  It was time for it to end, for a number of reasons, a clear end to the chapter, but i am still grieving.

It was different this time.  

I tend to date guys who I feel desperate to impress and so I end up shrouding parts of myself, trying to be who they might want me to be.  A little more of this, a lot less of that.

But this time, I was totally myself.  I was honest up front, mentioning healing prayer on a first date, brushing past some health issues on the third, bringing up some of my deeper dreams and goals not long after that.  He thought it was cute that I only listen to Radiohead during the day because I can get so easily bummed out.  He thought it was endearing that I spend so much time trying to pick out my outfits.  He loved that I love good food and made it a priority that we went to awesome restaurants that fit my foodie/GF specs. He respected how I’m pursuing healing on all levels.  He liked my sense of humor and took every opportunity to make me laugh–which was how we spent most of our time together.

I was more reserved than usual, but instead of being irritated, it made him keep gently pursuing.  We hung out for about 4 months and went really slow, but i can honestly say he loved me better than any of the other guys I’ve dated (and considered marrying).

So, today I am sad, but grateful.  Now I know what it feels like to be fully myself and to be fully accepted and delighted in for what I have to offer.  I hope I feel that way again.

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