After 3 awkward dates with R, I decided to call it quits.

me: Hey R, Sorry I didn’t call you back earlier this week.  It was just really busy
R: Oh, no problem, just wanted to chat with you about–umm
friendship, like, I don’t know what protocol is
On the networks
me: I’m definitely up for staying friends
R: oh, well, I already pulled the trigger.  I unfriended you on Facebook
me: Oh, well, okay, whatever you need to do to feel comfortable
R:  yeah, well, I did
—subject change to how our respective weeks went—
R: well, I don’t know about you, but, for me, well
what we had–I guess it was just 3 dates, but–
You are my North Korea
There was just all this expectation, but then, just one explosion and it was done.
me: Ohhh.  Well, thanks for calling!  Good luck with your work!

WTF?  I’m his North Korea?  What does this mean?
Are you calling me a communist nation?
Is it like, if you don’t date me, I’ll put you in a concentration camp?
There’s a demilitarized zone between us now?
If I’m your North Korea, you’re my Vietnam!  I never should’ve been there in the first place and it’s taking forever to get out!